am I overreacting

[David]

Sounds like he has negative preconceptions about Poker/Gambling and is being unfair or he was a problem gambler himself and is now reformed.

Challenge him to HU to find out.

Needs more love!

[666HARPS666]

Sounds like he has negative preconceptions about Poker/Gambling and is being unfair or he was a problem gambler himself and is now reformed.

Challenge him to HU to find out.

Needs more love!

Na just needs to be roshambo'ed

[AJG]

1 point not yet mentioned: Poker can often have a positive impact on your work performance (depending on what you do exactly).

1) It helps you think analytically, and all the other benefits that have been enumerated in various sources (mental acuity, psychology etc).

2) Your nightly (or however often) away games are a source of relaxation and socialising, making you a happier person, making you a better employee.

Tell him he better not make love to his wife Sunday/Mon-Thursday nights (or workday mornings), lest he be late for work or too tired to perform adequatly.

[Hagar76]

This is just my 2cents worth but i personally agree with bringing this to the attention of either union/hr rep as the fact is this will come up again, in terms of being angry,damn straight you should be, i would bet he would never tell anyone to skip footy training cause they are late the next day, or i'm sure the multiple people that come in hungover each week don't get the same warning its sounds like a shocking case of short man syndrome. I understand that you don't want to make waves but if you do it through the right channels i think you should be fine, i think doing nothing is giving him the power he wants, people like this need to be shown that we are currently living in 2010 not 1810. Short of that kneecap the f$%ker lol.

[gundog]

As a Manager and employer often involving a union or HR dept can create futher angst.

I would suggest that you make an appointment with the manager to have an informal discussion about the situation, at this meeting insist that you have an independant witness present (not a Union Rep), I think it is important that you attempt to resolve the issues without causing more problems, and you cannot just leave it go.

Make all resonable attempts to resolve the issues without any external influences, if all other avenues fail then involve your union.

Above all if you want to participate in any activity of you choosing out of work hours then do so because its none of their business until it effects your work performance.

You indicated you are in a country town, if the dispute between you and the manager gets out of hand, it can lead to restricted opportunities if it all blows up.........So sometimes its a case of " Build a Bridge and get over it"

[madali]

Thank you all for your advice. I went to poker last night and about a 1/4 of the players were from work. I got to work today and while I was talking with friends about the night at poker the manager arrived. Decided on the direct approach and said ( with these people present) "Oh hello how are you. I am really sorry I went to poker last night couldn't help myself but guess what I am here on time and before you perhaps you should take up playing" I then giggled to make the conversation light hearted. The other employees started to rib him then about not liking poker and he had to back track and say " I know she plays well I as trying to give you a chance "

He then kept me waiting for a meeting that we had but while I was waiting I fixed an error that he had made which was preventing the other staff from starting work. The senior manager of the centre saw this but I made out it was no big deal. And then in my meeting with him I let him know I had fixed the error and let him know that I had no problems doing this because we all needed to work as a team if we are going to succeed. Rest of the day we got on really well but near the end he made a dig about me doing extra work as I needed the money to pay for my next poker tournament. I just rolled my eyes and said "My god Mr xyz my life does not revolve around poker it is to pay for my sons 21st."(My son is having a game at home but he does not need to know that

In short making light of his comments is probably my best bet. My work is good , my attitude is good and on top of that I have feed back from a senior manager interstate that I have worked with recently that she is keen for me to work in a project which may be expanding in the future which I really enjoyed and which would be a big step back up.

Final comment on this manager. He is not a bad guy and his behavior of late really is astonishing me as I have always had a huge amount of respect for him. He really has helped me in the past and I am not sure what I have done to get this reaction out of him as we used to have a great working relationship. I hope we can go back to the way it used to be as I really dislike conflict.

Again thank you for you support it really did help and I am sorry if I have rambled a bit here but you all know I tend to go on.

[JMACK007]

Great to hear it worked out Gayle.

[AceLosesKing]

Screw that, I hate this guy.

[bennymacca]

Glad it worked out.

Btw, gundogs advice was great. (first time for everything lol)

[madali]

Glad it worked out.

Btw, gundogs advice was great. (first time for everything lol)

Agreed thank you gundog

Screw that, I hate this guy.

Yeah he may not be the nicest imho at the moment but I am trying to look at the bigger picture. Not only is there my own career prospects to think about but also I do not want to create a negative vibe at work. The people I work with ( long term staff ) have really been through the ringer in the last 12 months and we have all worked hard to keep each other motivated. After a huge downsizing of the business ( over 80% of staff lost there jobs) we are now starting to build back up. We will not attract new business with negative attitudes or with ongoing disputes. We have worked so hard and it is a great centre from major management down. I just think I need to concentrate on the important things such as working hard, being helpful and trying to be part of the success of the team. I really don't have the time or the energy to be dealing with negativity it is not in my nature.

Part of the reason I posted on here is because I did not want to be escalating something which may have just me being overly sensitive or overreacting . I wanted input from some intelligent people who would not be directly involved in the issue. Being a small town everyone know everyone which was a problem. You have all provided what I expected, some differing but great advice and really helped me when I was down. Again thank you.